Seven good enough for a lifetime of psychological allegory

yea no return in the space see, feel good, to turn around the

(a) the growth of fable: the growth of apple trees will never do a


an apple tree, and finally the result.
the first year, which end up with 10 apples, 9 were taken away, they receive one. In response, angry apple trees, then cutting off, in turn, refused to grow. The next year, it bears a five apples, four were taken away, they receive one.
However, it can do: continue to grow. For example, the second year, it bears the 100 fruit, 90 were taken away, they receive 10.
is possible, it is taken away 99, they receive one. But no matter, it can continue to grow fruit the third year-end 1000 ... ...
fact, how much fruit is not the most important. The most important thing is the tree to grow! Such as apple trees grow into towering trees, those who have hindered its growth will be weak to negligible power. Really, do not worry so much about the fruit, the growth is the most important. Psychological Review】 【

you are not a meridian of the work has since broken family?
started work, you talented, high-spirited, I believe that But the reality soon hit a few of your Sap, perhaps, you made a great contribution for the unit that no one seriously; perhaps, but not only by verbal emphasis on affordable; maybe ... ... In short, you feel like the apple tree , bear the fruit of their own to enjoy only a small part, and falls far short of your expectations.
So, you are angry, upset you, do you grumble ... ... In the end, you decide not to work so hard, to do to match their own income. After the past few years, as you reflect on that now you have not just the work of passion and talent of the time.
But the essence is that you have stopped growing.
such stories abound around us.
why make such mistakes, because we forget that life is a journey, a whole, we think we have grown over, now to the Results child's time. We too care about temporary gains and losses, and forget the growth is the most important.
Fortunately, this is not a Jin Yong novel of self-off passages. We stand ready to give up doing so, continue to move toward growth path.
Remember: If you are a working group, met do not understand management, management or error management brutal boss or corporate culture, then, to remind ourselves about, do Do not rage and grumbled while cutting their meridians. No matter what, have to do an apple tree will never grow because you always grow important than how much money each month.

(b) the motivation of the parable: the child for whom the play



kids frolic in front of an elderly, sounds and groaning . Over the past few days, the elderly unbearable.
So he came out to 25 cents for each child, said to them: This tribute money. Come out to the elderly and gave each child 15 cents. He explained that he had no income, only a small to some. It also can be 15 cents, children are still happily away.
the third day, the old man gave only 5 cents for each child.
children with rage, for him to play it! Psychological Review】 【

whom you Why is cutting off the tree in turn, because it is not for myself
two types of human motivation: internal motivation and external motivation. If the internal motivation to act in accordance with, we are masters of their own. If we are driven by external motivation, we will be swayed by external factors to become enslaved by it.
In this fable, the calculation is simple for the elderly, who will the children's internal motivation In order to obtain cents and play Fables of the elderly, a lot like your boss, boss? And cents, like not like your wages, bonuses and other kinds of external rewards?
as a reference, such as coordinates of the external evaluation, our emotions can easily fluctuate. Because we can not control external factors, it is easy to deviate from our internal expectations, let us dissatisfied, let us grumble. Gripe and let negative emotions such as pain, in order to reduce the pain, we had to reduce the internal expectations, the most common method is to reduce the work effort.
A person can form an external evaluation system, the most important reason is that parents like to control him. Parents too prefer to use verbal rewards and punishments, material incentives and other control children, not to ignore the child's own motivation. Over time, the children have forgotten their original motives, what are the external evaluation of care. School, he has forgotten the original motivation for learning --- curiosity and joy of learning; work, he forgot the original motivation of the work --- the joy of growth, the evaluation of superiors and income fluctuations into his work the largest source of pleasure and pain.
remember: external evaluation of the system often is a hereditary, but you can break it, from now on cultivating their own internal evaluation system, making learning and work into a

(c) Planning fable: a piece of paper folded 51 times



Imagine you have a big enough hand White. Now, your task is to fold it 51 times. So, How high?
a refrigerator? Floor? Or a skyscraper so high? No, a big change, the thickness more than the distance between Earth and the Sun. Psychological Review】 【


to now, I get asked a dozen people in this fable, only two people said that this may is an unimaginable height, while others think that is a maximum height of skyscrapers as high.
folded height of 51 such terror, but if only the 51 white paper stacked together?
This contrast made many people feel shocked. Because there is no direction, lack of planning in life, like the 51 White simple stacked. Doing this today, tomorrow little bit of that, every time there is no link between efforts. In this way, even if each work is done very well, they have your whole life is nothing but a simple superposition.
, of course, life is more complicated than this fable. Some people, life finds a simple direction and firmly to do so, they reached the other end of life unattainable height. For example, I have a friend for your life is English, he spent more than a decade efforts, only the memory of the word reached the amount of ten million and more, at this point to reach the average person can not match the height.
some people, and their direction in life is also very clear, for example, to start a company boss, so they need a lot of skills --- skills, management skills, communication skills, decision-making skills and so on. They may try doing this in the beginning, and try doing that, none is particularly proficient, but in the end, open the company boss in the direction of these seemingly scattered the previous integration efforts together, which is a kinds of complex folding in life, rather than simply additive.
Remember: the power of sight more useful than the invisible forces.
Now, the popular place to find the answer from the unseen, such as the potential development, such as Success, that we rely on some miracle of life can be saved. However, in my opinion, Counseling Center, Dongguan Heng Yuan consultant Maozheng Jiang said more correctly, avoid the fables: cat escape the shadow of the tricks



than have to think, They will see that they are crazy for their own shadow.
However, Tom and Toby finally have found their own solutions. Tom is always close their eyes. Approach is to Toby, always stay in the shadows of other things.

【Comments】
mental note of this fable, a little mental problem is how to become more psychological problems.
can say that all psychological problems are derived from the distortion of the facts. What facts? We mainly those suffering negative events.
because of the pain experience, we do not want to face the negative events. However, once occurred, negative events that is destined to be with us for life, we can do them up but is repressed into the subconscious to go, this is the so-called forgotten.
However, their subconscious will still continue to play a role. And, even if we have forgotten the fact that powerful again, the pain associated with these facts would still attack us, let us somehow sad, and can not be suppressed. This pain Let us further effort to escape.
development to the end, the usual solution is to these two: either, as we like the cat Tom and completely distorting their own experience, of life all the important facts are ignored negative; or, we, like kittens, like Toby, simply join their suffering to all of their things were very bad, since everything is so bad, that make their most original event is not sad ache so much.
clouds mental hospital consultant, said Li Ling, 99% of drug users had a painful experience. The reason they did drugs to make themselves to escape the pain. It's like hide in the shadows, painful truth is a devil, the devil in order to avoid this, simply to sell itself to a greater devil. There are many alcoholism
adults, they have had an alcoholic and abusive father, father survive a lot of torture. To forget the pain, they learn the same way. In addition to these visible
wrong way, we humans have invented a myriad of all kinds of ways to escape suffering, these methods Freud referred to as psychological defense mechanisms. Too painful, these defense mechanisms is necessary, but worse, if the distortion of the facts of psychological defense mechanism is so intense, it will take a more psychological problems, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, social anxiety disorder, multiple personality, or even schizophrenia.
really only one way to reach health - face the pain. Facing the pain would get a lot from the pain of unexpected gains, they will eventually become the life of the party of wealth.
Remember: shadow and light, as are the wealth of life.
one of the most important psychological law is, no matter how painful, you are no escape. You can only go brave face it and resolve it, beyond it, and it finally reached a settlement. If you own a temporary shortage of power, you can find help, find friends and relatives for help, or seek professional help, accompany you trust with you to face the pain.
American psychologist, Rogers was the most lonely person, but when he faced this fact and resolve, he became a master of the real relationships ; American psychologist Frank has a brutal and alcoholic stepfather and a bad mother, but when he challenges the fact and, ultimately, from the heart to forgive his parents, he became an expert in this area treatment; Japanese psychologists are Morita Ma was a serious neurological disorder, but he challenges the fact and finally through the invention of Morita therapy in their lives ... ... the most painful truth eventually became their most important asset. You can do the same.

(e) action fable --- crabs, owls and bats



crabs, owls and bats to cram on the habit. Few years later, they graduate and obtain a doctorate. However, the crab is still rampant, owls sleep during the day and evening activities are still the bat still hung upside down. Psychological Review】 【


This is even famous master of a fable, and its meaning is simple: action more important than knowledge.
used in mental health, this fable is also thought-provoking.
called profound knowledge of psychology. However, the more even the best knowledge of psychology help a person does not automatically become more healthy. In fact, I know some people who had studied psychology for many years, they learn one of the purposes of psychology is to rule themselves, but after so many years of school, their problems remain.
reason why this happens, a very important reason is, they do not personally, just far away as the knowledge of knowledge, knowledge, and not into their own life experience.
one of my friends like psychology, has been considered less sensitive than those of psychology, not suitable for Psychology. But the fact is that speculation is not correct. He is not sensitive enough, but he has a very big advantage: to know a good knowledge immediately in their own lives to do it. As a result, the knowledge that becomes a distant real life experience, he does not
If we say that the quality of high sensitivity is a genius, then the power is more important Gao genius quality.
this fable can come out of another meaning: Do not expect too much the magic of the mysterious psychological treatment. Always the most important force in your own body, the mysteries of knowledge, the potential development of mysterious, dazzling success and so forth, are far inferior to the power of your own body has been important. We used to go outside to find the answer to someone else looking for strength, the results have forgotten the power in themselves.
Remember: other people's knowledge can not automatically save you.
punch if some renju touched you, if some text or a new creed inspired you. So, these other people's words and experience are just a start, more importantly, a good knowledge you think you really use in your own life to go. Jewish philosopher Martin Buber
these words, I have always considered the most important:
you'll have to start. If you do not love to go deep in a positive life, if you do not own way to reveal the meaning of life for themselves, then for you, life will remain meaningless.

(VI) to give the Fables: bees and flowers



withered roses, the bees are still hard to suck, because suck it previously had to spend from this little sweet. But now in this little to spend, the bees suck the venom.
bees know this, because the venom bitter taste is the big difference with the previous. Thus, bees anger, however, breathe on it the whole world looked up to complain about, why the taste changed? !
Finally one day, do not know why, bee vibrating wings, flying a bit high. At this time, it found, withered roses around the flowers everywhere. Psychological Review】 【


This is the fable about love, is a young language teacher of the true sentiment.
some time, she was falling out of love, painful, and always wanted to talk about me, I hope I can give her some knowledge of psychology help. We have some time, but almost two months later, the total time they can not happen to get together.
the last time about her, she said: She had just returned from Jiuzhaigou back. The pain of lost love is still plagued her, let her trance, unable to enjoy the beauty of Jiuzhaigou. Inadvertently, she noticed a little on the honey bee is a flower. That moment, her mind like thunder and lightning appeared in one sentence: ;, of course, nature does not do the little bees, only man was such a silly, she's the bees in this sentence refers to her own course. That moment, she had to give up the truth out of insight. Previously, she wanted me to help her out, but in fact, the long wings in her own body, she can fly to fly.
give up is not easy to give up love, especially painful. Because, love is when our young copy of parent-child relationship. Small children, no matter from which side, parents can not do without. If a complete denial of his father and mother, and that means death for him, this is the ultimate harm and fear. We have experienced more or less been denied parents the pain and fear, so when love - a copy of the parent-child relationship once again we experience the pain and fear, we can easily become very emotional bad.
However, compared to love and parent-child relationship, there is a huge difference: a child, nothing we can do, all parents have the final say; but now, We grow up, we have the power to choose their own destiny. It can be said, a child, we do not have wings bee, but now we have a pair of powerful wings.
However, when deeply in love, we will return to childhood, we will forget a pair of wings to fly. When we realize that, after their love is no longer automatically copy parent-child relationship, our love was free, there is a give up power.
Remember: Love is two things, two completely equal, independent and human dignity thing. You can work, but not that hard for you there will be results, because another person, you can not determine.
So, no matter how much you care about the time love, if another person determined to leave you, please respect his choice.
And also remember, you are no longer a child, are left with the pain of torture. You have grown up, you have a pair of powerful wings, you can fly out of a relationship has become poison.

(g) close to the fable: the unique Rose



Little Prince has a small planet, planet Suddenly a tender and beautiful roses blooming. Previously, only some unknown on this planet the flowers, the little prince had never seen such beautiful flowers, he fell in love with this rose, carefully nurtured her.
those days, he thought, this is a unique flower on earth, only his only planet, other places are not exist.
, however, so he came to Earth and found that there is a garden just the same as 5000 of this flower. At this time, he knows that he only have an ordinary flower.
the beginning, this discovery, let the little prince was very sad. But in the end, the little prince to understand, although there are many roses in the world, but his planet tis is still unique because that rose, he had water, cover flowers to cover her with a screen protection over , in addition to her body caterpillars, but also to listen to her grumbled, or boasted, listening to silence her ... ... a word, and he tamed her, and she tamed him, she is his unique roses.
Fox said to him. Psychological Review】 【


This is a French classic times, but still until 2005 understand this.
face of 5000 roses, the little prince said: But now we empty the increasingly popular We are anxious to have
. Seems that each has had a rose, the value of their own lives to Duoliaoyifen. Internet age, with several ten lover, is no longer a rare thing too. But I know who these promiscuous, no one is empty. They do not enjoy the relationship, they just enjoy the conquest.
did not have before, they will do anything to narrow the distance between. But once you have, they will quickly lose interest in this intimate relationship. the stronger the desire to conquer, the faster the rate of loss. ; For such people, a rose garden roses than a unique and more attractive.
However, the relationship between the United States, almost two inputs is the extent and degree to be tamed. When two people are naturally going into, naturally, be tamed, the relationship will become a life nourishment, so that a person's life becomes more filling and more beautiful.
However, no matter how intimate. The Little Prince is still Prince, Rose is still a rose, they are still two individuals. Rose not to travel if the little prince, little prince or non-travel the roses with me, they have to stick together, the relationship is no longer enjoy, but will become a burden.
Remember: both a close and mutually independent relationship, the relationship is better than a thousand general. This relationship will bring us the sense of loneliness from the hopeless rescue is the most important in our lives a kind of salvation.
If you have not experienced, you can not know the beauty of this relationship.

Exclusive songs

I always believe that love is the intuitive sense it is not just opposite sex attraction
you my heart is so sober that it be considered a moral of love, I will change my
Cherish the love of my voice to sing with my feelings for you and me

song for me more than you love me really
True meaning word by word transfer treble sound is my breathing
corresponding low dependency
video you put me to give up even if the world will I forget
at least in my mind I I have a love if one day you
old
hand we gradually accompanied by , or why you and I
to analyze differences in personality as you and me I have a perfect understanding
cherish the love will change your voice with my feelings with my
sing the song of me and you not only for the
I even love my switch to a single word you
sincerely
treble sound is my breathing low dependency
the corresponding audio and video you for my ring action even if the world Melody
people in my heart of love songs dedicated the song I love you
belongs to you my songs I will work hard for you to sing for
Exclusive songs dedicated to you what I mean
love each note is the evidence of your youthful dreams
beautiful boy will be in my heart that the last
I love the sound or change your
exclusive songs over and over that the first tail
I found out that they had endless love for you

Regrets the encounter 10 12

Once again, I used to open the thousands listening, and that the first familiar songs court, seemed to feel the passion of the great cry of the South Stand, seem to hear the captain told the players: We are Milan, Milan, unique in the world, so any difficulties can not defeat us, the future is always in our hands, we wish to go with the firm, because we are the masters of the San Siro.
Oh, Milan, my heart's beloved. I believe. I think if there is God's love, then you will encounter is the direction of his guidance to me, If you love God, then All my life I can not forget is that he'd only told me to follow the direction of the heart. now September clouds my heart if, in the drift between the lingering aftertaste with you, dependent, such as volume Yunshu I love romantic, so entangled in my life with you off the bustling prosperity. plain water in my life, learn to appreciate the joy you bring me, although accompanied by a low, but these are long enough to make me tired in your kind heart and warm atmosphere to relax, you take me in the realm of dream in the quiet ecstasy.
my love, my faith, my life I have no regrets of the encounter - Milan.
Falling maple leaves fall in a meet in my life
faith
life everywhere from his figure
He fills my whole stars
heart crazy Let me love you so much hope that he can not extricate themselves
been so tough and unstoppable
wish he had been standing on the top does not fall < br> However, he again puts the fate of tease
how exactly this is how the
is a cycle you do if someone
Can you tell me if everything is really only meant
inevitable
I think I will still love him so strong
This love along with the pain and vulnerability
but I still want a little bit to the delivery of such
out my love
even though from love to sink
I love and I can not go back
sad
right there willing to do so love you my faith life with no regrets

< br>

Light

Late at night, the noise of the day was quiet , looking at the hazy months , the heart also some confusion, I know , is a subtle longing and happiness filled the heart empty.

whom melancholy has been thought not , can not suppress the evening to see your avatar , want to hear your voice , want to talk to you ..... . know you will not be do not want to leave. Because the shadow of you here have your breath, have your handwriting , they let me get some comfort . I can see you quietly , carefully read you think you lightly . Although it is not like the pain of osteoclasts , the heart is sour, Sese .

the moon is not round , today's state of mind is not the United States, today's text is not smooth , you know? Because eyes are always floating in your shadow , because without you the information. Always guess what you are doing , you busy , always wanted to ask : How are you?

light along the way, also used a touch of greeting , a touch of blessing , a touch of knowing each other, moved in the light of happiness with our life and time.

do not say you do not want you want , do not love you not love you, because we walk the road in mind , I know , you know , the Voice of the stage playing and singing without , understanding the mind is better than a thousand words.

not want to have the fireworks -like emotions , unforgettable moments of brilliant will bring the pain ; as long as the rain moistening the Relax and comfortable, long, distant .... ..

mildly worried about you, always have a beautiful range , so that the edge of the highest power is still going. Pleasant scenery to accompany this piece of our lives every season.

light , is beautiful ; light before long !

Disease ( 1)

Home yesterday, I found myself sick.
first bad headache, followed by cold extremities, whole body got into the covers are coming out sweating. The next day a body temperature, there are as many forty degrees! Looked at my mother's anxious face, and concern, I was guilty of acid in waves. I said, Mom I am sorry for you, your son is a failure. My mother on the forehead with a towel to wipe the sweat that, silly child, what to say foolish things? You're a little fool.
I think in this world or my mom know me best. Really, only three words gave me all decades of life made a complete summary. I think that I was a little fool!

lying in bed tossing and turning can not sleep yesterday, called on the gum and the rack of lean pork with the back door of our school stand to drink.
gum and rack of lean pork is my college buddies, the same school basketball team. Their side while pouring me Ah you ask me not a bad mood? I said there would be no call you to drink so much nonsense? Chewing gum say hey you still want her kid, right? I said shut up you fucking me!
in my bottle after bottle of beer towards filling the belly, when the boss smiling, carrying a basket of crabs do not come to ask us to take a few. I looked at it a few baskets in the claws of crabs, scrambling desperately to climb out, but ultimately fall time and time again, could do was spitting white foam! I pound the table Zhirang suddenly, do not do not, you fucking fast away. My boss yelled puzzled, half-day pressure of cross God did not come.
gum quickly say I'm sorry I'm sorry he was drunk. I said I was not drunk. You know my heart that ass! I feel like that a few crabs, then obviously have a lot to face but you could not utter a word, it takes a hard shell, only grinning spit bubble!
I said you fucking do not eat, to walk. Gum said, Well we went to the Bund to see a beautiful girl. Now think about it, then I should not listen to the kid's a bad idea to what the Bund! Riverside Avenue Shangban Ye
there is also full of pairs of lovers, all arms around walk steadily. I saw a shadow really looks like you, wearing silver tights make a man a golden arm around the waist. And if they disappeared in a flash, the crowds, I really want to go up to punch the little bitch!
I really do not understand what today's girls like what kind of man? This is purely as the main street punks, actually spent sleeping places can be Liu. I'm 22 years old, but still remain a love record vacuum. Rack of lean pork, said whatever the outcome, we considered not bad man, why is nobody cares about it?
watching the streets were filled with a picture of a happy face, round and round as if a fire was humming in my head. I was suddenly a tear my chest shirt, button down the floor playing.
I cried in front of the Huangpu River. Dark river, suddenly from the waves like a hysterical cry me a response. I do not know
gum and rack of lean pork was surprised how much his mouth wide open, do not know how many people stopped to see me, I did not care. I only know about if I do not call, maybe really will immediately charge through the air like a basketball, like explode!
Then God began to rain on the unthinking underground. Rack of lean pork and chewing gum while I'm looking for a place to take cover while pulling together to run.
I said, impatient? And then you run fast, do not also rain in front of?
rack of lean pork and chewing gum are shook his head, looking at me looking like a fool. I do not go to ignore them and just keep walking slowly towards the rain. A man so I decided to walk home Linzhao Yu. Rack of lean pork and chewing gum but also to pull me, and I said, nobody should you follow me, who follow me who I hit!
time in the rain, as if on their own thoughts to find a place to hide. At that time I really do not want you, my mind empty, as was the rain to wash it again like this. I think this is my heart most calm since a few months time.
rain climb hair, climb over the cheeks, and crossed his chest. I suddenly lifts his voice to sing:

I Monazhongming ah! I will not turn round. She is like a angel / she is so beautiful / so ordinary I / I open my mouth / heart know / chase her results / lucky / not me / I Monazhongming ah, the wheels will not turn to me ... ... < br>
I walked from the sidewalk of the road, beside from time to time, but after the vehicle Jishi, splashing mud all over me.
I'm walking in the rain, shouting, singing, feeling like a lone wolf howling in the desert.
so I went home, the rain had stopped, my body has already dried out. I lay in bed, head to the pain starts to go up.

Driver after rape

driver after being raped somewhere in the country, there is a driver driving a bus carrying passengers, the line Chi In the winding mountain road. Buses three thugs was eyeing the beautiful driver, forced the bus stop to get off with the driver to
;
only a thin middle-aged man answered to rise, but was beaten to the ground. Men's rage. Rose loudly passengers to stop violence, but nobody responded. Let the driver was towed to the mountains bushes. Half an hour later, the three criminals and the driver Yishanbuzheng return. Hour later. Driver to be injured man off thin blood. Men refused to hold up stubborn.
:
Middle-aged man was really angry the body without the power of heroes! To save not save as, can not be given this death was the result of the expulsion to get off her, he should no less. ;

did not expect that the full car just yet turn a blind eye to the atrocities passengers. But as the bus, concerted efforts to persuade the man to get off: reminiscent of Guy de Maupassant's lines,
;
three thugs grinned. A smug smile. There is no sense of shame in a black rogue, said: ;
child luggage thrown from the window, he then gets shoved down. Automotive and smooth driving on mountain road, the driver her hair and turned the tape recorder. Peak vehicle approaching a turn and will go downhill, the car is off hilltops to open the left side of the road, the right is Baizhang cliff. Quietly accelerated the car, the driver was very calm face, his hands clenched the steering wheel, eyes glistening with tears Tang Chu.
;
one seems aware of what thugs, said: The thug tried to grap hold of the steering wheel, like a cosine of the arrow towards the cliff ..
... .

next day, the local newspaper reported: the crouching tiger mountain tragic accident yesterday, fell off a cliff CMB. Thirteen car drivers and passengers no survivors. Middle-aged man who was chased off to see the paper and cried. Who do not know what he was crying, why cry ... ...



reading does not turn the dead family ..... very accurate!!!

Lonely bird

Birds of the air , your loneliness more than I , or my lonely than you . the rest of the time, you with me , okay . so you're not lonely , I'm not alone
silent clouds , is more than I am sorry for you , or you more than I forbear . after the journey , forget me , okay . so you will not be sorry , I forgot to remember .....